Today's Cool News

My Drive from Dallas to San Francisco, 12 Seconds at a time

smi23le on 12seconds.tv

Stumble of the Day: Wha' Yew Meen I Gots An Accent?

Howdy pardner, this is big Tex writing this blog to ya from Fairview, Texas yessireebob!

If y'all needs help translatin' mah drawl, check out the Speech Accent Archive an see if yew can undersaynd whaht those fellers is a-sayin..

Here's what I'm a sayin to ya tho mah son.  The only feller who submitted a speech sample for this here accent archive from Dallas Texas sounds like he's been a-visitin' with them college folk, ya no, the kind that listen to that NPR sheeeit.  He don't sound like no Texan I ever done heard of. What the heck is up with that?  Do a search for your hometown and lemme know if ur kinfolks talk like these fellers.

Boat Wars: The Sea Lions Fight Back with Poop

And you thought sea lions were just cute, smelly creatures who keep the tourists engaged at Fisherman's Wharf.. well think again because it appears the Sea Lions are declaring war on humans.

The San Luis Obispo Tribune reports sea lions are on the attack all up and down the West Coast.

The sea lions are a dilemma because tourists love to snap pictures of the playful seals as they bark and joust on docks. But the brown behemoths also commandeer boat landings, swamp skiffs and poop on sailboats.

This year at the port, they have damaged numerous boats, may have contributed to sinking three of them and seem to be losing their fear of humans, harbor Manager Steve McGrath said.

(snip)

Port San Luis’ sea lion problem mirrors a trend along the West Coast from Baja California to British Columbia, said Garth Griffin, supervisory fish-

eries biologist with the National Marine Fisheries Service in Portland, Ore.

Sea lions are increasingly feasting on migrating salmon, raiding bait boats and making themselves at home on docks.

Fishermen also complain that sea lions and other seals are depleting fish stocks.

“There’s an upward trend of conflict,” Griffin said. “All of this is happening in a way that we are getting more and more complaints from more and more locations.”

Harbor managers and boat owners are frustrated, though, because they are constrained by federal law in the methods they can use to protect property from sea lions.

You can squirt water on them, shoot paintballs at them, scare them with loud noises and even prod them with a broomstick — if you dare get that close.

But you can’t do anything that could injure a sea lion.

Just wait until this war escalates and see if humans don't take the gloves off.

Nobel Prize Awarded for Psychedelic Art

Those wacky Swedes thought they were giving out a dynomite Nobel Prize last week for Chemistry to Osamu Shimomura, Martin Chalfie and Roger Tsien for discovering green fluorescent protein, commonly called GFP, and developing the protein as a powerful tool for basic biological research.

But take one look at this image and any stoner worth his bong knows the real purpose had to be to create cool psychedelic artwork. 

Science news has a very cool slideshow depicting these trippy paintings masquerading as images of stuff inside your body lit up by the jellyfish protein.  Enjoy, and if anyone asks, it's all in the name of science.

TV Station Threatens Blogger for Calling an Anchor "Hot"

I just wonder how the doofus GM in Richmond thought this was going to end?  Did he really think he would intimidate Jack the Bartender or imagine that this childish e-mail would remain "private"?

Jack the bartender,

I have just reviewed your blog site and I want to request that you immediately remove the false, damaging, and salacious statements you’ve made about WTVR/WUPV Anchor/Reporters Ric Young and Lee Mahaffey. If this material is not removed in 24 hours (by 500pm Thursday, October 1, 2008) I will ask our attorneys to prosecute you and your web hosts to the fullest extent of the law. If you have any questions about this request, or WTVR’s intent, contact me at the number below.

(Name Redacted) General Manager CBS 6 WTV

The posts in question focus on one anchor who showed up at Jack's bar and allegedly undertipped the wait staff.  The other simply refers to anchor Lee Mahaffey as "hot" and as someone he would like to convince to "make some bad decisions."

Leaving aside the obvious fact that TV stations consider the appearance of anchors (believe it or not, sometimes more than his or her journalistic qualifications), what part of being a "public figure" does WTVR GM Peter Maroney not get? 

You would think MSM operations would be thrilled to get attention from bloggers, especially ones in a key demo that don't watch TV much anyway.  I could understand if the posts were threatening but this blogger is just snarky and so far the law, let alone common sense, doesn't prohibit snarkiness.  If it ever does, reach me at the Snarky jail...

Stumble of the Day: Northern Lights

Me and Allan Ginsberg

The first time I met Allan Ginsberg, he gave me his phone number to memorize as a mantra.

The second time I met the legendary beat poet, he told me that he loved coming to Dallas because it was one of the few places where you could still get a good shoeshine.

Then we went upstairs to his room at the old Melrose Hotel and recorded this:

KRLD's Brian Shields interviews poet Allan Ginsberg 1987

I'm Famous

Over the last few weeks here in Texas I've been getting a bazillion subscriptions to my FriendFeed.  Now I know why.

It appears Robert Scoble (if you're a geek you know who that is) has put me on his list of "Top Tech Blogger/FriendFeed/Social Media" types. 

So I guess that means I had better start blogging more. 

My Trip to Dallas, 12 seconds at a time.

I've become a huge fan of 12 seconds and will be updating from the road and during my three to four months minimum in Dallas.

Watch for the updates here and in the meantime enjoy some of my previous 12 seconds extravaganzas.

smi23le on 12seconds.tv

On to the House

<p><strong>><a href='http://projects.washingtonpost.com/2008/pick-your-president/'>2008 Election Contest: Pick Your President</a></strong> - Predict the winner of the 2008 presidential election and enter to win a $500 prize.</p>

Tom and Naomi

http://www.thenation.com/doc/20080714/brave5_video

Torturing Children for the President

Loma Prieta Loves Me

Stumble of the Day: What Language You Talkin' to Me At?

http://www.bartleby.com/61/images/indoeuro.jpg

Joaquin with Dinosaurs - PG 13

My friend Joaquin Waters has a new documentary out about dinosaurs... but be careful, parental guidance suggested.. (I sure needed some.. Mommy what does Joaquin mean when he talks about mating until all the females are gone?)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1qy6Ut6EJM

Why I Haven't Been Blogging (Here) Lately

KRON 4's Brian Shields reports

Stumble of the Day: Rubens Tube

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HpovwbPGEoo

More Songs About Building and Food

The Talking Heads once put out a great album with that name "More Songs about Buildings and Food."  Now it appears the top head is taking the theme a step further by turning a building into a musical instrument.

From the AP:

Ex-Talking Heads frontman David Byrne plans to
turn a landmark building in Manhattan into a giant musical
instrument.

State officials say Byrne will create a temporary installation
in the Great Hall of the Battery Maritime Building, which is next
to the Whitehall Ferry Terminal.

The "Playing the Building" installation will include devices
attached to ceiling beams, plumbing, electrical conduits and other
parts of the structure. Sound will be produced through vibration,
making the building function as an instrument.

The installation and a new waiting room for ferry passengers are
set to open in late May.

Stumble of the Day: The Button that George W. Bush Pushed

Is This Why They Call Us Heads?

They have head shops in Texas, or at least they did when I lived there.

So why would you need to go down to the local graveyard to dig up a skull to smoke out of?

From the Houston Chronicle:

The Kingwood teenager's story of decapitating a corpse and using the head to smoke marijuana was so outlandish that at first Houston Police Department senior police officer Jim Adkins did not believe it.

Yet, Kevin Wade Jones Jr., 17, appeared almost indifferent as he relayed the bizarre description of his and two friends' activities at an Humble area graveyard, Adkins said.

"I just doubted it because it's very morbid, and I couldn't see anybody doing something like this," Adkins said Thursday.

Not until police went to the home of another Kingwood 17-year-old, Matthew Richard Gonzalez, did the officer believe the tale.

"He regurgitated in his plate of food when I asked him about it," Adkins said. "So I knew there was some truth to the story."

Now, Jones, Gonzalez and a juvenile whose name has not been released are each charged with abuse of a corpse, a misdemeanor. All three were arrested Wednesday night.

Police said a fourth suspect is wanted for questioning.

Houston police believe the teens disturbed the grave of an 11-year-old boy who died in 1921.

If you haven't already regurgitated in your food at the thought, Slate's Explainer takes a look at how tough it would be to turn a skull into a bong, er water pipe, officer.

If it's true that the kids stole a skull, could they really have used it as a bong?

Maybe. If the Texas teenagers recovered a skull in ideal condition, they would still have a lot of work to do before they could smoke weed out of it. There are different types of bongs, but any workable model must offer a seal tight enough that water and smoke cannot escape. Assuming the skull was used right-side up, and that the pot-smokers used the brain cavity as their bong chamber, thin fissures in the eye sockets and any other holes would need to be sealed with something like grout to prevent the smoke from seeping out. The teens would also have to cover over the base of the skull, which contains a large opening through which spinal nerves reach the brain. And there are dozens of small nerve holes, called foramina, which might produce a watering-can effect if left unplugged.

I'm sorry, these dudes don't look like grout users to me.